PTI SET, WASHINGTON, DC – DAY

Tony Kornheiser and Mike Wilbon sit at their desk on the set of “Pardon the Interruption,” as the red camera light flashes to life.

The “Five Good Minutes” graphic glimmers on the nearby monitors and…

Doo-doo-doo-DOO-doo.

TONY: We’re back boys and girls, and we welcome to the program the winner of last week’s Kentucky Derby, and the owner of a lustrous, wavy mane Wilbon can only dream of: Street Sense.

Street Sense (Age 3), the dark bay colt with a flowing black mane, looks on from the large satellite monitor in the studio.

STREET: Thanks for having me.

MIKE: Congratulations on the big win Street.

STREET: Thank you. I appreciate that.

TONY: Check out that mane Wilbon. You’re consumed with jealousy. Admit it.

MIKE: I think you best look in a mirror big boy.

TONY: Seriously Street, look at the head of hair on you. The fillies must go wild for it.

Street whinnies softly and shakes his head with bemused embarrassment.

MIKE: I’m not so sure it’s the hair they’re impressed with.

TONY: Well, let’s get to that. You were in 19th place at one time in the race – 19th place! What was going through your head at that point?

STREET: Well, you know, that was a heck of a field out there, and we knew that going in…

TONY: But you were the favorite. Starting off in 19th place couldn’t have been part of the plan.

STREET: Naaaayyy, it wasn’t. That’s for sure. But I never panicked. Calvin was riding me hard to get to the rail…

TONY: That’s Calvin Borel your jockey.

STREET: Right. We had a plan and he kept me focused on it.

TONY: Sure, but – ha! – When you say he was riding you, this isn’t Phil Jackson yelling at Kobe to pass the ball. He’s literally riding you.

STREET: Sure.

TONY: I mean that’s got to get annoying sometimes, doesn’t it?

STREET: Naaaayyy, its’ all part of the game, you know? To tell you the truth, when I’m locked in, I don’t even notice him.

TONY: Wilbon, what if you had a little man riding you all day?

MIKE: I’m not even gonna touch that one Tony, but Street, I’ve got to ask you: How were you able to blow by Hard Spun at the end? Was he just completely gassed?

STREET: Well, that mile-and-a-quarter isn’t as short as you think. Sure, he was probably a little tired, but he ran a tough race. I don’t know. I was lucky enough to have a good strategy and great people around me. I just count my blessings.

TONY: And speaking of lucky, a lot of gamblers had a decent day betting on you; you were the highest paying favorite in Derby history.

STREET: I heard something about that.

TONY: So you are aware of the odds and the payouts?

STREET: Sure. I can read, you know. It’s tough to find a story anywhere in our sport that doesn’t talk about the odds. But the odds don’t mean a thing when you’re out there on the track.

TONY: So gambling in your sport is no cause for concern?

STREET: Naaaayyy, not for me it’s not.

Street whinnies with glee.

MIKE: I know why he’s laughing Tony. Street, as we all know, you’re good friends with Charles Barkley.

Street nods knowingly.

MIKE: And there was a little bit of controversy over that friendship. So much so that he felt compelled to make it quite clear that he would not make a bet on this year’s Derby – or any race that you’re in for that matter.

STREET: Yeah, well, look, it’s silly. Anyone who knows me knows that I would never jeopardize my career or the integrity of the sport, but you know, better to be safe than sorry.

TONY: So there’s no gambling situation with you and the Chuckster?

STREET: Naaaayyy. Not unless you count me taking his money out on the golf course.

Tony and Mike break-up laughing.

TONY: We love Charles on this show, but as we all know, he possesses both a troubling gambling habit and a horrendous golf swing. Can we take a look at…

Stock footage of an abysmal Charles Barkley golf swing rolls on the monitor.

TONY: There it is. Look at that swing!

MIKE: That’s cold Tony.

STREET: You should see him with a polo mallet.

TONY: Really?! Do you play polo together, too?

STREET: Naaaayyy! Are you nuts? That dude’s not climbing on my back. Maybe if he gets back to Dream Team weight, but not now.

TONY: Oh, wow!

MIKE: Charles, we know you’re watching. Tony and I had nothing to do with that. That’s all on your boy.

STREET: He knows I’m just playin’. What’s up Charles?

TONY: Alright, let’s get serious for a minute. Queen Elizabeth was at the race…

MIKE: Oh boy, here we go with the royals...

TONY: Wilbon is less than impressed, but, come on, she’s the Queen. Did you get to meet her?

STREET: I did actually. She came around to the paddock a little after the race and fed me an apple.

TONY: Really?! She fed you an apple? What do you think about that Wilbon?

MIKE: Alright. Not bad.

TONY: But didn’t I just read that she invited your jockey Calvin Borel to her special state dinner at the White House?

STREET: Yeah I saw that.

TONY: So you weren’t invited?

STREET: It’s not really my thing.

MIKE: There you go again Tony, stirring it up.

TONY: He’s the horse who actually won the race; I just thought he might want to dine with the Queen.

STREET: Hey, she’s a nice lady and all, but come on; she’s no Catherine the Great.

Tony and Mike absolutely lose it. They’re cracking up.

TONY: Did you hear that Wilbon?!

MIKE: I think so Tony, but I’m afraid to ask any more about it.

TONY: Alright Street, we’ll get you out of here on this one. Be a real horse and tell us that you’re going to win the Triple Crown.

STREET: Ooh. I don’t know. I’m grateful for what I’ve been able to accomplish so far. A lot of great horses over the last few years couldn’t win the Crown.

TONY: But don’t you need to win the Triple Crown to truly be a legend?

STREET: I don’t know. Look at my boy Smarty Jones. He came up short at Belmont, but everyone knows his name. And he’s living the good life now.

TONY: Sure he is. He’s retired to stud.

STREET: No need to be vulgar about it, but, yeah, my man’s having a good time.

TONY: There’s nothing special about that, though. That’s how all the former Derby winners spend their days.

STREET: Not Funny Cide.

Tony and Mike wince.

MIKE: Ouch Tony.

TONY: Funny Cide, of course, is a gelding. What do you think about that Wilbon?

MIKE: I am not down with that Tony. I don’t care what kind of trouble he caused as a youngster. Gelding? Uh-uh. Get that junk outta here. That would lead to a little something I like to call a beat-down situation.

TONY: It sounds more like it was a gots-to-go situation.

MIKE: Oh, no you did not say that.

STREET: Like I said, I just count my blessings.